DVD Review: Somthing Borrowed

I'll make this short: Don't see this movie.  Actually, I could be a little bit longer ... Don't see this movie unless you like seeing people have affairs and complain about life.  I spent at least 75% of the movie SMH.  Kate Hudson is a massive brat, Ginnifer Goodwin continues to be pathetic in every role ever (insecure much?) and I was truly rooting against everyone.  Except Jim from the Office ... my wife says I remind her of him, so he must have been brilliant. :)

Grade: F!!!!!!

Movie Review: Crazy, Stupid, Love

It seems like movies about "complicated" relationships are either happy stories where everyone ends up with all the right people at the end and all problems are solved OR they're incredibly sad stories where people who seem like they should be together just keep missing each other and everyone ends up unhappy in the end.  This movie is an almost perfect compromise of these two extremes.

Here's the plot: Steve Carell is an office drone and Julianne Moore is his bored wife.  It's clear from the first scene that romance is not a priority for these two and Moore blurts out over dessert that she slept with a co-worker (Kevin Bacon - AWESOME) and wants a divorce. Carell's response fits his character - he rolls out of a moving car.  This is part of what makes the movie work - the characters act like actual humans! (not that normal people jump out of moving cars, but I think we've all been in scenarios where that seems like the best option!) Anyway, Carell heads to the local nightclub where he meets Ryan Gosling and the male version of "She's All That" starts.  Gosling teaches Carell how to dress, walk, talk, drink, meet women, etc.  He usually leads by example, which means that he's a huge ladies man, UNTIL he has a girl turn down his offer of companionship (Emma Stone) ... and of course he can't get her out of his mind. The second half of the movie focuses on each character deciding what they really want and going after it.  Will Carell fight for his wife?  Will Gosling find Stone and sweep her off her feet?  Will Julianne Moore take Carell back or add some Bacon to her life?  Will Marisa Tomei be hilarious in a small role as a divorcee? (Spoiler alert - YES)

Like I mentioned above, this movie straddles the line between corny and hopeless, and it's carried by strong performances by Carell and Gosling.  Carell's brilliance is his ability to make tragic scenes funny without losing the emotion.  He's like a loveable Jim Carrey. And Gosling is in his element as a smarmy ladies man - it makes you wonder how much "acting" he was doing ... :)  For her part, Stone is very charming in the role as Gosling's romantic ideal. And Julianne Moore is great at being conflicted, indecisive, and needy without being pathetic.  Both Moore and Carell project real emotion toward each other and you believe in their marriage, even if it might not stand the test of time.

Travel Review: Austin, TX

Most people who know me know I'm not a fan of Austin - partially for reasons that are out of its control.  For instance, it isn't Austin's fault that the Huskers couldn't beat the Longhorns if UT started a 7th grader at each position.  And Austin didn't ask to be located on I-35, which isn't the Bolivian Road Of Death, but it's close - and has maddening traffic that can spring up out of nowhere and easily turn a nice 3.5 hour drive into a 5+ hour death march.  But getting there is only half the battle.  I've always rooted for the underdog, and Austin is anything but an underdog. It's more like the Miami Heat (go Mavs!).  Everyone, everywhere, loves Austin.  And most descriptions I've heard of Austin start with "Well, it's nothing like Dallas ..."  As someone who lives in and enjoys Dallas (yes, I understand that we have loads of Affliction shirt, bedazzled pocket jeans wearers and $30K millionaires) a part of me just wants to let everyone know that Austin isn't exactly immune to pretentiosity (pretty sure that's not a word ...), and despite what you've heard, isn't Shangri-la, the Fountain of Youth and the Garden of Eden all rolled up into one big happy free love, cheap dope Utopia.  Most people love to eat at chain restaurants, only shop at Whole Foods if it's close to their house, think Pabst Blue Ribbon tastes like crap, and pay way too much for their house.  Part of that isn't really Austin's fault either, though.  It's become such an attractive city that businesses flooded in and the resulting executives want comfortable lives.  The median income level in Austin is $43,000 - more than 25% higher than the national average!  With wealth comes a desire for comfort, and Bohemian living doesn't feel very comfortable when you have Starbucks and Chili's a block away.  In essence, I think people fall in love with an idea of "Austin" that doesn't exist.

HOWEVER ... I went to Austin last weekend for a wedding (congrats, Scott and Jacie!!) and while I was there I thought back over my past three or four trips to Austin, and each one was a super fun trip.  The trailer food parks, the neon signs on South Congress, the wacky bars of Sixth Street, the trees and beautiful Hill Country landscape, hundreds of mom/pop restaurants/coffee shops/clothing shops, the general fitness vibe ... it all adds up to a really fun place to be!  I still can't imagine living there, but I've truly never had a bad - or even a mediocre - time when in Austin.  It's been a fun trip each and every time.  

The rehearsal dinner was held at Abel's on the Lake and was an awesome setting.  It was pretty hot, but the sunset over the water and the coolish breeze helped.  The morning of the wedding, several guys played golf at Butler Pitch and Putt (near Peter Pan mini golf) and had a great time.  The course isn't recommended because of the smooth greens and lush fairways (each tee box was a square of astroturf), but we all still had a great time.  One thing that I appreciate about Austin is that it doesn't always take things seriously.  Every time I've gone to a golf course my goal is to shoot the absolute lowest score I could.  We had a friendly wager on this game, but in reality it was a great time being outside and scores weren't that important.  The wedding was at a place called Mercury Hall, and it was a little building with a nicely shaded outdoor area for the wedding.  Even though it was blazing hot outside the heat and breeze made the evening very bearable and the reception was beautifully decorated.  You can probably guess that the DJ was awesome!  He actually had turntables and everything so he truly mixed the songs and played some great stuff.  The dance floor was generally packed (don't worry - I didn't dance very much) and everyone enjoyed themselves.

So after another fun weekend trip I think it's time for me and Austin to kiss and make up (smoke the peace pipe? how do these things work in Austin?).  I'll admit that from a tourist's perspective it's a fun city with a very active (running/biking) vibe and tons of personality if Austin will admit that some of the personality is contrived and it isn't the center of the universe.  That seems fair, no?

DVD Review: The Dilemma (starring Kevin James and Vince Vaughn)

What would you do if you found out that your best friend's wife was having an affair?  That's Vince Vaughn's "dilemma" in this movie (I'm going to refer to him as Vince, b/c his character's name is Ronny, and let's be honest - it doesn't fit at all).  I'm a huge fan of Vince.  I celebrate his entire catalog, from Swingers (my favorite) to Clay Pigeons (weird) to Couple's Retreat (paycheck).  And for me, he's the reason to see this movie.  Vince and Kevin James are partners in a car engine making business (or something - you can ignore that entire plot line b/c it's nonsense.  Kevin James as a genius engineer?  No thanks.  Queen Latifah as a consultant with creepy sexual metaphors?  More realistic, but triple no thanks.), and they're best friends.  (One non-surprise: Kevin James likes to dance and isn't very good at it!  We've never seen that before, have we?)  James is happily married (it seems) to Winona Ryder and Vaughn is with long-time girlfriend Jennifer Connelly.

Very early in the movie Vaughn learns that James' wife is cheating on him (with admittedly hilarious Channing Tatum) and confronts her.  Through a series of blackmails, amateur spy operations, and other slapstick we learn that each person in the threesome has a skeleton or two that they don't want brought out of the closet. This is where the movie takes a strange turn - it stops being a buddy comedy and becomes a much darker relationship/morality play.  Vaughn struggles with whether to tell James about his wife's wandering eye, while also trying to understand James' own philanders (he like happy ending at local massage parlor).  It's easy to sympathize with him as he tries to process the fact that his "heroes" are both living relationship lies. And I give the movie credit for not romanticizing or glorifying the affair or the massage parlor.  As the stress builds, Vaughn dives into his rambling, funny man schtick with a long, uncomfortable toast at his girlfriend's parent's 40th anniversary party.  Finally, everything comes to a head when an intervention is planned for Vaughn (all of his weird reactions and creepy stalking made people think he was gambling again). The ending wraps up nicely without being trite (again, ignore the Kevin James as genius engineer part).

I personally find Vaughn's wild ramblings hilarious, so I wanted to like this movie.  And I appreciate that they tried to make the actual "dilemma" into a real dilemma without minimizing the impact of an affair.  The casting was appropriate as well because I think by now Winona Ryder has reached the petty crimes Tyson Zone (see Bill Simmons wiki for explanation) and she plays it to the hilt here.  However, there was so much other nonsense going on in the movie (Vaughn's gambling past, the car engine meetings, Queen Latifah), that it had a hard time getting the engine started.  Either it should have been a comedy a la Couple's Retreat, or it should have been a drama and really explored the emotional impact of marital unfaithfulness with occasionally funny lines.  The second option is probably beyond this cast's limitations (I'm looking at you, Paul Blart, Mall Cop), although Connelly was very good as Vaughn's patient girlfriend.

Movie Review: The Hangover 2 (starring Bradley Cooper and Ed Helms)

You know how bad you feel when you have a hangover?  And then you promise yourself you're never going to drink that much again?  And then you go out the next weekend and drink that much again?  That's what this movie is like - if you woke up the second weekend with Mike Tyson's face tattoo.  It's "The Hangover" on speed - each joke is raunchier, funnier, and more outlandish than before.  I laughed the whole way through (when I wasn't cringing, that is).

The story starts with Stu (Ed Helms) planning to get married ... in Thailand (or Thigh-land as Zach Galifianakis continuously calls it).  He tells Phil (Bradley Cooper) and Doug that he just wants a Bachelor Brunch at IHOP to make sure nothing messes up his wedding this time, but he'd really like them both to come to the wedding.  Of course, they eventually invite Alan (Galifianakis) to complete the wolf pack.  I think these set up scenes are among the funniest in the movie. You get the feeling that Galifianakis is ad-libbing about half of his lines and they're hilarious. I'm assuming the gag reel on the DVD will be as long as the movie.

Anyway, they get to Thailand and soon realize how much Stu's father-in-law hates him (Stu already knew it). But hey, at least they're at a great resort and no one's going to get roofied while drinking a beer out by a campfire or anything, right?  And they aren't going to wake up in a dirty Bangkok hotel with Stu's brother-in-law missing, right?  OK, I'm kidding.  All of that happens.  And that's when we get the awesome phone call from Phil to Doug's wife saying, "Uhh, we really $#@#ed up this time ..."  I must say that the whole audience cracked up at that scene.

The rest of the movie proceeds exactly like you expect.  And if there's a criticism of the movie it's that it's too much like the first one. At points I caught myself thinking "Is this "The Hangover I"?"  But when director Todd Phillips hits the accelerator he really mashes it down.  This movie isn't for the faint of heart - I think my wife had nightmares last night - but it sure is hilarious, and you get what you paid for ... another hangover that's even worse than the first one.  I left thinking "There's no way I want to see that again" but then we met up with some friends and started talking the hilarious scenes and .... I have a sneaking suspicion that if there's a Hangover 3 (let's be honest - there were three "Crank" movies ... Hangover 3 is as certain as Galifianakis prancing around in his underwear at every appearance) I'll be right there ordering shots, totally forgetting the pounding headache from the last time. :)

What did you think?  Have you seen it yet?  Are you planning to see it?  Not enough male nudity for you? Do you think you'll see it again?

American Idol Guest Blogger: Taylor takes on Scotty!!

So you may have noticed that I've kind of lost interest in American Idol as the season progressed.  To me, the characters were wooden, the judges were lame, and the whole show just got boring.  So now that it's over for this year, I couldn't bring myself to write about it at all.  BUT - my wife enjoyed the season and (as you'll soon see) had strong opinions about it.  So without further ado, welcome my first guest blogger ... TAYLOR!!!!

OK, I've needed an entire 24 hours to pass before I could talk about it...

[sigh] Scotty is a nice kid, but he's not worthy of the AI title. Period. I knew he won it when they showed live shots from their hometowns - Scotty's fans FILLED an ENTIRE STADIUM!!! Obviously I don't see (and most importantly, HEAR) what those fans see. ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, the show had to know that he's been leading the voting probably since day one so they knew to make the rest of the show AWESOME & kept the crowning until the very end and didn't really focus on it!! I LOVE BEYONCE!!! And how about JLo shaking it like nobody's business??!!?? Oh, and Tim McGraw -- I was hoping Faith would join Lauren, but Carrie was great. Interesting how I like the sound of Lauren better than Carrie, but Lauren can't hit the notes Mrs. Underwood can. Come on Lauren, you can be a star if you'll go for it! And she's only 16!!!

The only way the show could have been better [minus the OBVIOUS fact that Scotty won] would have been to have Celine and Pia sing together! Wouldn't that have been TV worthy? [Observation: Scotty & Pia lack personality. Scotty brilliantly displayed that when he won.] Yikes, strong feelings from Taylor.

Another thought - these judges created an incredible cast for us to watch. Even though I think their criticisms could have been more pointed [wait a second, did they criticize?] the judges did a great job selecting the top 20 or however many there were.

Will I allow Scotty's win to stop me from watching next season??? That is the question...the answer: If JLo stays on, I'll watch!

Movie Review: Fast Five (starring Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, and The Rock)

So what can I say about this movie?  It's terrible, but in an awesome way.  Or it's awesome, but in a terrible way.  I guess the best way to put it is this: when you go to Chuck E. Cheese, you don't expect to eat prime sirloin.  So as long as you go into the movie expecting it to be what it is, then it comes through - big time.  Just a warning: I'm going to talk about the plot a little bit, and I'm not going to put in Spoiler Alerts each time because, if it's possible to spoil this plot for you, you probably haven't seen a movie ever in your life (hint: it's predictable).

Here's the gist of the plot (stop me if you've heard it before): Diesel is a convicted felon (but a lovable convicted felon), and Walker is his old nemesis who is now dating (married to?) his sister. They steal some cars, go to Brazil (why Brazil? who knows!), steal some more cars, drive really fast, get in fights, drive even faster, and take down the evil overlord of Rio - by planning to steal his safe full of money.  Of course, this requires the fastest driving of all.  Oh yeah, Diesel took acting lessons from Batman - his voice is so low and hoarse that most of his lines come out like sounding like Mumbles from Dick Tracy (I know, mixed metaphors are bad).

I could probably write forever about this movie, but to be succinct, I'm going to break it down into the FIVE most ridiculous scenes.

1.  Cliff Diving:  While escaping with stolen cars (these guys are felons, remember), our heroes drive off a cliff approximately 3 miles high.  No problem - there's a river at the bottom of the canyon so they just get out of their seat belts and pretend they're cliff diving, landing softly in the water.

2.  The Rock:  Everything about his is ridiculous about him in this movie (which means he's awesome). He's as muscled up as his WWE days and either has a sweating problem or they continually hosed him with oil and most of his lines could be delivered by Ivan Drago.

3.  Safe Pulling:  There's an extended scene where a massive safe is pulled by cars. Let's just say Terminator 3 was more realistic than this whole scene (that's not a compliment, Vin).

4.  Vin Diesel's height: In one scene he looks The Rock in the eyes (Rock is 6' 4"), then in other scenes he's not close to as tall as Paul Walker (listed at 6' 1").  Is it embarrassing to film a scene standing on a box?

5.  Inconsistent US Law Enforcement: In one scene, the Rock and his troops are confronted by dozens of thugs with drawn weapons. Of course, he calmly pulls out his pistol and a mean look and the thugs all back down.  BUT in another scene, he bursts in with drawn weapons and when Diesel's friends draw theirs ("This is BRAZIL!!!") the Rock backs his troops down.  So confusing.  What kind of training are these fake federal agents getting these days?

There's so much more ridiculosity - in fact, it's almost as much fun to talk about it as watch it just for the wild scenes.  And it seems like this is a viable movie franchise that could make 10 more movies - they've moved beyond racing movies and crafted a heist franchise, kind of a poor man's Ocean's Eleven.  They may be terrible and dumb but they're just so awesome!

So what did you think?  Are you looking forward to Fast 6: Lubbock Dirt Roads?  Did it need more cars? more fighting?